Do you ever hesitate doing something because you’re concerned it might not work?
That something sounds great but you don’t say yes because you’re worried it won’t deliver the outcome you want? Or maybe you’re afraid you won’t follow through?
We’re even more cautious when we feel we’ve made “bad” or “wrong” decisions in the past because we don’t want to experience the pain of “yet another mistake” (this used to hold me back massively).
But the truth is we cannot possibly know something will be a success until we give it a go – and just because things work for others there really is no guarantee they’ll work for us.
Have you ever tried to follow someone else’s system and “it’s not worked” – even though you’ve followed all the steps exactly as they’re laid out?
You see we’re taught that when something works for one person it will work for everyone:
“If I can do it, you can do it!”
I was a big advocate of that!
But now I know that that’s simply not true.
We’re all very different.
Our life experiences are different, our gifts and skills are different. Just because for one person it’s easy – and fun – to do something it doesn’t mean that everyone else will be as successful simply by following the same steps.
I remember speaking to a prospective client once who wanted to create a blog and do online marketing. It was a means to an end – creating passive income. Yet she hated being on her own in front of a computer and she disliked writing. So I asked her why she wanted to spend her time (our most precious resource) doing something she hated? She had never asked herself that question – for her it was a means to an end and would enable her to give up her job (which she enjoyed somewhat but didn’t give her the income she craved).
That one question made her re-think her whole business idea.
And I see so many people do this (including myself) – believing that in order to have x we must do y.
And knowing this is crucial when it comes to our offerings – because if we’re not excited by them, we’re going to struggle to sell them.
But we often can’t see this and blame our mediocre results on the system believing “it doesn’t work” or “I’m rubbish at this.”
It’s not that “it doesn’t work”, or that we’re “rubbish at it” – it’s because we have no passion for it.
It also perpetuates the myth that WHEN I’m achieving x THEN I’ll be happy. Especially as we are conditioned as children that we have to do things we don’t want to do (think school!). And this gets so ingrained that as the years go by we don’t even know what we truly want any more – we simply latch on to what other people tell us will work because they’ve had success with it!
It’s why when I’m coaching I’ll regularly dig deep to explore what really lights you up. Some of my favourite questions to gain clarity are:
- Does this make your heart sing?
- If you were independently wealthy would you be doing this?
- If you had 12 months to live would you spend your time doing this?
I find these questions help get to the heart of what’s truly important – especially if we’re in business to make a difference in the world.
I used to think I wanted to create an online business with systems and procedures. Set the system up once and generate income over and over – “rinse and repeat”. Sounds great in principle but it involves a huge amount of computer work to not only set it up but keep it running. You’ve got to love numbers and clicks and testing and measuring – which I kind of like but it doesn’t make my heart sing!
Instead, what my heart truly craves is freedom and adventure. Exploring new avenues, pushing the boundaries – seeing what’s possible. It’s why I love live retreats and working one-one-one with people because there are always new layers and levels to explore.
A totally online business was the last thing I wanted! But I wasn’t aware of that so was busy beating myself up for procrastinating and not moving forward!
Crazy huh? But sadly it’s sooooooo common!
So, if you’re getting lousy results in your business, maybe it’s time to stop trying to figure out what to do to fix “the problem” and take a look to see what you’re really passionate about – the answer might surprise you!
Remember often it’s not what you’re doing that’s the issue – it’s how you’re doing it. And when you give yourself some space to explore what you truly want to create then magic happens.
If you’d like some help with this do sign up for an Exploration Session by clicking on the link below: