When it comes to selling transformation, marketing experts teach us to sell using the “Gap Method”.  They teach us to present our coaching as the “missing piece” – the vehicle that will take our clients from A – B.

As a method it works.

However, many spiritual entrepreneurs feel uncomfortable selling in this way.  And it’s because a part of this method of sales clashes with who we are at our core.  As spiritual beings we know that there is no “missing piece”.  We intuitively understand Divine Flow – and deep down we know nothing is missing – we are perfectly whole and complete.

So, when we try to market ourselves in a way that implies someone is “missing out” when they don’t say yes – it feels off.

We energetically recoil from it.  That means we either don’t do it, or we do it but don’t get the results we desire.

However, it’s not the method of selling that’s wrong.  It’s how we integrate it into our business.

What is the “Gap Method” of Selling?

Your dream client has something they want help with.  They might want to:

  • Lose weight
  • Get more clients
  • Launch an online programme
  • Heal their gut
  • Have a better relationship with their children
  • Make more money

And, there’s a gap between where they are now and where they want to go.

  • Maybe they’re 93kg in weight and want to be 65.
  • Maybe they have 2 clients and want 10.
  • Maybe they’re working in person with clients but want to expand their reach and do something online (or vice versa)
  • Maybe they have IBS and want to heal it naturally,
  • Maybe they fight with their children and want to have a harmonious family life.
  • Maybe they’re earning £40k and want to earn £100k

Whatever the gap – you can help them.  Chances are you’ve done this in your own life and had extraordinary results and now want to share it with the rest of the world.


You are the bridge between where they are now and where they want to go


You have the tools and experience to give them what they long of.


However, it’s not your job to sell to them.


Yes, you read that correctly – it’s not your job to sell to them.

Most sales courses will teach you about conversion and closing the sale.  The have trainings on objection handling and what to say when someone says “I can’t afford it” or “It’s not the right time”.

I used to teach it myself.

But I never felt comfortable doing so.  Back then I thought it was because I hadn’t mastered it myself so how could I teach it with integrity?

However, having looked at what I taught and what I actually did in my sales conversations, I realised that it wasn’t a lack of mastery at all.  It was because deep down I knew that attempting to change someone’s mind not only takes a huge amount of energy – it doesn’t work.

For many “I can’t afford it” or “it’s not the right time” are polite ways of saying “I don’t want to buy this”.

You don’t want to waste your precious energy on trying to persuade someone who doesn’t want your help.  Plus, they won’t do the work even if they do hire you.


So, if it’s not your job to sell to them – what is your job?


It’s your job to invite them to buy.

Now this might seem like splitting hairs, or semantics – but it’s not.

The energy behind it is VERY different.

Think about a party you’ve hosted.  It might be a big celebration like a 40th or 50th birthday party, or a wedding.  Or it could be something small and intimate – a dinner party with special friends, or a picnic in the park.

Whatever you’re hosting, you’re inviting others to join in the celebrations with you.  You’re excited, you lovingly prepare invitations, you let people know and ask if they can come.

You know some will be able to make it, but others won’t for one reason or another.

When someone says no, you might be disappointed because you won’t get to see them.  But you don’t take it personally and think they don’t love you.  You don’t get upset wondering whether you should have made the invitation more beautiful or worded it in a different way.

That would be absurd.

Yet we do it in business all the time.

We come off a sales call and that person that we know we can help said no – we’re gutted, wondering what we could have done differently.  We question our skills, start doubting ourselves.

We believe we must get them to say yes.

But that’s not our job at all.

Instead there are 3 elements that are important in our role as a salesperson selling transformation:

  1. We need to ascertain whether someone would benefit from our services (this is where the Gap Method is golden).
  2. If yes (and only if yes), we extend an invitation to buy from us by telling them about the service which best meets their needs. We then ask if they’d like to go ahead.
  3. We hold space whilst they make their decision – supporting them and honouring their process. This is a huge step they’re about to undertake – it’s important we honour their courage.

I’m sure you can feel how different the energy is when selling in this way.

There’s no need to feel icky – you’re simply inviting someone to work with you.  Your energy is light and buoyant – the same as it is when you send out those party invitations.

Of course, there are ways of making that invitation which will influence people’s response and whether they say yes or no.

However, where you are coming from accounts for 80% of your success.

And then your job then becomes about connection and interacting with people – making new business friends who may or may not become clients.

The more you enjoy the sales process – the more clients you get to work with.

Win / Win

Much love,