The most tedious blog post ever written

I was lurking on Facebook the other day and I came across a post from someone who was assessing the interest level for a tele class he was considering offering. It was for people who were not “there”, but wanted to be “THERE” (wherever there was for them).

It was proving to be pretty popular with 89 comments from people who all wanted to “be there”.

The desire to be “there” is something I’ve wanted to talk about for a long time – but from a completely different vantage point.

What I’ve noticed is that, the desire to get “there” is a driver for so many people – almost like it’s in-built into our human psyche.

We believe that when we “get there” – wherever that may be – then we’ll be happy.

Then we’ll live the life we truly want.

As I see it this belief starts to be implanted when we’re tiny babies – when our parents encourage us to sit up, to crawl, to say our first words, to take our first steps – and are so utterly delighted when we do so.

It gets implanted still further when we go to school – where the focus is on “achieving” (“getting there”) making sure we do the best we can so we get good grades enabling us to get into university or get a good job.

After school or university we might jump on the “corporate ladder” (what a great way to describe the climb to get “there”).

Or maybe we choose to go down the entrepreneurial route and run our own business (perhaps moving on to this after trying the corporate world and finding it didn’t give us what we truly wanted).

And again as entrepreneurs our goal is to get “there” – “there” generally being a monetary goal – 6 or 7 figures (or anything in between or beyond).

But if we actually stop and look honestly at what is happening in our lives we’ll notice that it doesn’t matter what stage we’re at – there’s a constant striving for that next goal or that next level of success.

Whether our goal is to earn more money for ourselves or our family or it’s to “give back” or “contribute” in some way to our fellow humans.

Even a spiritual path is often a journey of striving to get “there” – with “there” being spiritual enlightenment or feeling a certain way (at peace, in flow, happy, having fun, being in the moment).

And so often we get “blown off course” (either we deviate from our path or “true purpose” or someone – or something – comes along and knocks us off). It may feel like 2 steps forward , 1 step back (or worse 1 step forward, 2 steps back).

Of course we can only be “blown off course” if we’re on a particular path – a journey to “there” (whether we’re conscious of it or not).

12 months ago I was unconscious to the fact that I was striving to reach an invisible “there”.

I was convinced I had jumped off that particular train.

But in a coaching call in January 2016, during a very “dark” point in my life came this realisation (coupled with a feeling of despair) that:

“I was never going to get there”.

It came as a shock because I truly believed I was no longer on the “trying to get there” path.

That I’d moved beyond that phase.

That I was living in the “now”.

Yet I wasn’t –I had merely shifted “there” from the tangible (a specific goal) to the intangible (a feeling of wholeness).

And in an instant I could see it.

And something shifted.

Because during that call I experienced that there truly was no “there”.

Every time we want to get “there” (because our lives will be so much better when we’re there) we’re missing out on the very essence of life.

We’re unable to experience the magic that comes from simply being alive because we’re trapped in our thoughts of a better future.

And whilst it might sound pretty nuts – the way to experiencing what we truly want – which we falsely believe “getting there” will give us – is to drop all desire to be “there”.

We’re already “here” – is there a greater gift than experiencing life itself?